DEAR DEIDRE: DESPITE being married I’m having sex as often as I can with my best friend’s wife – because she wants me and shows it.
The sex is brilliant and she’s a lovely woman.
My best friend’s wife ended our passionate affair and I can’t get over her[/caption]
My wife is great too but our marriage is passionless. We hardly make love and she doesn’t “do” kissing.
I think our last proper kiss was on our wedding night and since then she’s only let me kiss her on the cheek.
My wife is 40 and I’m 41. We have two teenage kids. I work for the council with my mate.
He’s always told me his wife was a bit of a flirt and sometimes they’d go swinging on weekends. They don’t have children.
When my wife’s 40th birthday was approaching, I set up a group on WhatsApp with my friend and his wife so we could plan a surprise party.
I couldn’t believe it when my best friend’s wife answered the door in a skimpy dressing gown[/caption]
We had a fabulous night and my wife couldn’t believe I’d planned everything (with a little help from my friends).
Our group chat continued and we reminisced about the night. Then my friend’s wife sent me a separate message and asked me to go round but not say anything to her husband.
I assumed she wanted to plan some sort of surprise for him, so I went round after work when my mate was at a darts match.
I knew something was up as soon as I saw her. She’s 36 and was dressed in a skimpy dressing gown.
She looked incredible with her long brown legs. She came over and kissed me and it was heaven.
Sex with my best mate’s wife was exciting and passionate, unlike with my wife[/caption]
I hadn’t been kissed in years. She kissed my neck and chest and I did the same for her. It felt wonderful.
I’d fantasised about her before and I couldn’t believe this was happening. She said she really fancied me, so we went upstairs and had sex.
We have continued to see each other for sex for eight amazing months but now she says it’s all over. She says my mate is getting suspicious.
I offered to leave my wife for her but she said no. I know ending it is the right thing to do but I can’t get over her.
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DEIDRE SAYS: Thank goodness she has called a halt to it before any more damage was done.
Even if the sex was good with her, that does not mean day-to-day life would have worked out happily.
Accept the affair is over and talk to your wife about how miserable it makes you that you are both missing out on passion in your marriage.
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There is almost certainly a reason for this that could be sorted if you are both willing to try.
Did you two never actually discover what works for her sexually?
My e-leaflet on Reviving A Woman’s Sex Drive explains how.
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